ROAD HOCKEY

My son is almost 4 years old.  We play a variety of sports in the backyard, at the schoolyard and in our driveway.  Our driveway is not that wide or long, so recently I decided to expose my son to a dissapearing Canadian custom, Road Hockey.  I actually had to convince myself that it would be safe and that it was a good idea to play on our quiet Toronto sidestreet.  So off we went, our 10 month old daughter in her harness on my back, my son, 2 hockey sticks purchased at a garage sale and a tennis ball.

Before we stepped onto the road I explained the rules.  "When Daddy says, CAR, go to the closest sidewalk as soon as possible and stay there until Daddy says you can return to the street".  My son nodded to confirm he understood the rules.  For good measure I had him repeat them to me, "So what happens when Daddy says CAR?".  He paraphrased my instructions to my satisfaction.  When we took the first step on the road it was like a step of freedom.  We proceded to pass the tennis ball back and forth.  My daughter was sleeping in her harness on my back.  I noticed the first car turning onto our quiet street.  Time to test the instructions.  I yelled "CAR!".  With excitement and precision my son ran to the closest sidewalk, watched the car pass and waited for the all-clear from Dad before stepping back onto the road.  Soon my son started scanning the road behind me between passes, for any cars approaching.  It was amazing to watch his awareness of his environment grow.  He used his vision and auditory skills as his car radar.  After a couple more times of me calling "Car" and both of us executing the plan, my son started to feel empowered to trust his growing awareness.  If a car approached behind me he started to call "Car".

In addition to his growing awareness, the increase in space on the street allowed him to learn the consequence of not effectively stopping the ball with his stick.  He learned that he had to run to get the ball if it skipped over his stick blade.  This natural consequence led to an increased level of focus when he was accepting a pass.  The additional space also gave him the opportunity to use multidirectional movement and physical literacy to stop passes that weren't aimed right at him.

The Fall 2010 issue of Pursuit Magazine features an article called "WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO PLAY?".  This is a must read for parents of young children as well as parents to be.  The article focusses on the lack of physical activity with Ontario youth.  More than that, it challenges our new culture.  Our culture of fear with respect to our children.  Children don't play at the school yard, more children are driven to school now more than ever before and people certainly are not playing road hockey any more.  Why.  Fear and inconvenience.  Parents are afraid of their children being scooped up by a psychopath and it's easier to register the kids in a league, than it is to roll the ball out at the school yard and play with our children or supervise a group of children playing.  More and more students are being driven to school because it's easier.  This article is very important as it points to the solution being a cultural change.  While we may be making life easier for children in the short run we may be condeming them to life of obeisity riddled with heath issues in the future. 

Urban sprawl has changed life.  As personal property has grown, in certain areas, there is no longer need to congregate at the school yard, because every child can play by themselves in their own driveway or backyard.  Urban sprawl has also challenged the pedestrian lifestyle as there is more and more distance between home and school so it seems to only make sense to drive the kids to school. 

We encourage our children to be independant thinkers, self motivated, conflict resolvers and to develop self confidence and make friends.  We look to the schools and community programs to facilitate this.  Give your child a ball and go with them to the school yard.  Be a guide on the side if there are other children at the park to play with and watch them create their own game, rules, norms and values, all without you.  Similarly, instead of driving your child to school, walk with them.  As they get older stop a block short of the school and let them walk the final block on their own under your supervision.  Increase the distance they are walking on their own and if possible pick up one of their friends up on the way to create a buddy system.

How did we get here from a simple game of Road Hockey? Fear is the reason why there are fewer Road Hockey games played in Toronto.  Not to mention the oppressive neighbors who call the police on kids playing road hockey.  Fear is the death of free play with children and with children facilitating their own way to school in the morning.  Let's consider the benefits.  In 45 mins playing Road Hockey with my son on our quiet sidestreet, his awareness grew exponentially.  That awareness could lead to self preservation in certain situations as he becomes more aware of environment and understands how to apply the rules Mummy and Daddy create for his benefit.  This Road Hockey situation is an example of how to build learning environments for our children so that they can become self directed, benefit from discovery based learning and accessible physical activity.  I never even touched on the fact that Road Hockey and child facilitated transportation are free types of physical activity.

Read the PURSUIT MAGAZINE article and let me know your opinion.

BEING YOUR BEST YOU

Each morning I go for a nature walk.  The walk is a great start to my day and facilitates, optimism and inspiration. 

This morning I thought about a particular student at the school where I work.  This young woman inspires me with her courage and accomplishments.  As adults we take every opportunity to pass wisdom on to someone younger or less experienced than ourselves.  With students, we try to motivate them to be the best they can be, so that they may realize their true potential.  This is the unwritten responsibility of each adult.  We must positively guide and mentor so the next generation maximize their potential and so that the world is a better place now and in the future.

This morning, I wondered "How many of the adult mentors, teachers, coaches, sources of wisdom, have endeavored to be the best they can be?"  My father used to say "Do as I say, not as I do", which is valid because it's important for young people to "taste the Kool Aid" (thanks Sef) presented from their mentors.  However in our efforts to support, inspire and motivate the next generation did we forget something? Did we forget ourselves?  Have we become distracted from opportunity for our own self improvement?  Are we accessing or creating opportunities to be the best us that we can be?

Many mentors, teachers and coaches chose to live vicariously through those they mentor and abandon their own quest for self improvement.  As we get older we chose to believe that the obstacles to our personal growth are real and growing exponentially.  This is not true.  At different stages in life many adults ignore their "Beginners Mind" (BM).  Our BM allows us to appreciate things like we've seen them for the first time and also inspires us to take risks and journeys for self improvement and self discovery instead of being paralyzed by fear, anxiety, insecurity or ego.

Robin Sharma suggests a very interesting list of "The 10 Human Regrets" in his latest book The Leader Who Had No Title.  It would be deflating to know that tomorrow is your last day, however it would be even worse if any of these regrets applied to you:

You reach your last day with the brilliant song that your life was meant to sing still silent within you.

You reach your last day without ever having experienced the natural power that inhabits you to do great work and achieve great things.

You reach your last day realizing that you never took any bold risks and so you never received any bright rewards.

You reach your last day full of pain at the realization that you never took any bold risks and so you never received any bright rewards.

You reach you last day understanding that you missed the opportunity to catch a glimpse of mastery because you bought into the lie that you had to be resigned to mediocrity.

You reach your last day and feel heartbroken that you never the skill of transforming adversity into victory and lead into gold.

You reach your last day regretting that you forgot that work is about being radically helpful to others rather than being helpful only to yourself.

You reach your last day with the awareness that you ended up living the life that society trained you to want versus leading the one you truly wanted to have.

You reach your last day and awaken to the fact that you never realized your absolute best nor touched the special genius that you were built to become.

You reach your last day and discover you could have been a leader and left this world so much better than you found it.  But you refused to accept that mission because you were just too scared. And so you failed.  And wasted a life.

It's never too late to be your best you.  Allow the courage of many of the youth around you to inspire you to be your best you.  Direct some of your own wisdom towards yourself.  Let's not live through young people, instead allow them to teach you some things about yourself and how great you can be.  Are you being your best you? jas